Demon Eyes
by staceycj
Summary: Post S4 ender. Sam and Dean have a knock down drag out fight, and something unexpected halts their fight and reminds them of who and what is important.


"We need to move. Other hunters are going to be on our asses Sammy." Dean said and started packing things.

"I don't know if I'm ready to go yet Dean." Sam said. He still felt the demon blood coursing through his veins. On some level he was fairly certain that he would never feel right again, certain that his body was going to crave this poison until the day he died.

"It's been two weeks Sam." Dean pointed out callously. "You are standing upright."

"But just because I'm standing up right doesn't mean that I'm ready to be out there fighting demons, fighting Lucifer for God's sake!"

"You can stand, you can fight."

"Don't give me that shit that Dad used to feed us."

"That's the shit you were feeding Adam."

"This is different."

"How is this different Sam? You are up, moving, walking around, not having seizures anymore." Dean swallowed hard when he said the last. The first time Sam went through withdraw had been difficult, had been damn near impossible to see his brother convulsing on the ground, guttural noises coming from his lips, his big strong body at the mercy of his misfiring brain. It broke his heart the first time, and the second and third time didn't do much for Dean's sanity or his broken heart.

"But I don't' know if I can face demons right now."

"You scared?" he asked and he meant it to come out soft, didn't mean for it to come out like a challenge, or derogatory. But Sam heard the derogatory, Sam heard the challenge, and his breath sped up.

"You calling me weak?" Sam asked softly, the rage barely contained just below the surface. Dean sighed and turned to his brother, he hadn't meant for it to sound that way, but the turn of the tables just ruffled Dean's feathers.

"So, it's okay for you to call me weak, but it's not okay for me to return the favor."

"Dean! I was doing what I thought was right…"

"You were freaking drinking demon blood Sam!" Dean shouted back. "That's not doing something right! That's being a sheep!"

"Sheep! Look whose talking. You follow Castiel around…"

"He's a freaking angel!"

"An angel that dicked us both over!" Sam said getting within inches of his brother's face.

"But at least he wasn't a demon who was hell bent on making me his bitch, and an addict!"

"No! You just came back a broken husk!"

"You go and spend some time in Hell and see how you come back out!"

"I've done my time in hell! This whole freaking year has been nothing but hell on earth for me!"

"There is no comparison Sam! You don't know what hell is like…" Sam opened his mouth and Dean closed the last step between them and pointed his finger straight into his brother's chest. "You say boo hoo one more time and this time, so help me, I will put your ass on the ground."

"God! You don't let anything go do you! That was the freaking siren!"

"And that whole pathetic thing at that Asylum three years ago was just nothing too. Man Sammy, these evil types sure are able to make you say some horrible nasty things that you just don't mean."

"My God you are impossible!"

"Me!? Impossible. If I'm impossible than you are just freaking stupidly…" Dean floundered for a word.

"Jus can't come up with vocabulary Dean?"

"I gave up my childhood…"

"What the hell ever. Get over it Dean!"

"You get over your own stupidity Sam! You are the one who can't tell the difference between right and wrong!"

"What the hell Dean!" Sam was getting more and more angry with every word spoken between them. "At least I wasn't dumb enough to sell my soul. At least I'm not so broken that I can't live without you."

"No, you are just dumb enough to screw a demon and suck her blood. Oh yeah, that makes you nothing but a pathetic addict Sam. A loser sheep." The rage inside of Sam made his hands itch to hit. He wouldn't do that. Just as he was about to say something equally as nasty to his brother, Dean's whole face elongated into a mask of disbelief and fear.

"Christo." Sam's eyes drew together in confusion. The anger in the air instantly gone.

'What? Where?" He looked around for a demon and saw none.

"Your eyes. They went demon."

"Oh come on Dean!" He said as the anger started to boil again, leave it to Dean to exaggerate and try to make him out to be some sort of demon.

"I'm serious Sam. Come on." He grabbed Sam's arm and drug him to the dresser mirror, and he starred at himself, and saw the black, saw the demon eyes, and he staggered back. Dean caught him before he could trip over the duffle bag that was behind his ankles.

"Oh my God." He said softly and touched his eyes. "Oh God." He said more frantically and Dean had his hands pinned before he could do what he wanted, before he could scratch out the black orbs that were now starring back at him. Panic overtook and he thrashed and ended up on his back on the bed with Dean sitting on his stomach pinning his hands under his knees and his face in his hands.

"SAM!" he yelled. "Sam stop it! You are going to hurt yourself." The anger and fear had drained from Dean and all that was left was his brother, his little brother Sammy, who was hurt and scared, and that just put Dean into protector mode. "Sammy. Sammy. I'm here, I'm here. Stop, stop. Calm down." He said in his best reassuring tone. Sam finally stopped thrashing, and Dean felt confident that he could let Sam's arms up without Sam making a break for it and scratching out his own eyes.

Sam's breath came out in heavy pants, fear coursing through his veins along side the poisonous demon blood.

"What did I do? What did I do to myself Dean?" he said softly and tears streamed out of his closed lids.

"Sammy. It's okay. It's okay little brother." he said as he pushed hair from his brother's face. "Open your eyes for me. Let me see."

"No!"

"Sammy, we have to know how bad."

"What if it's permanent?" He asked after a pause.

"Then you wear a whole hell of a lot of sunglasses. Now come on. Open them. Trust me." Dean waited for Sam and like always, Sam eventually came around and opened them. Hazel eyes greeted green, Dean smiled.

"They're fine Sammy. They're fine." Dean slowly got up off of his brother's stomach and let him sit up. "Go ahead and look. I wouldn't lie to you." The last statement held many different meanings for Sam and he nodded quickly, wiped away the tears and looked in the mirror and saw his normally hazel eyes starring back at him. Relief flooded through his veins and he looked at his brother.

"Dean. What have I done?" he asked in a pathetically small voice. "I'm not human anymore. I'm a monster." Dean grabbed his brother's face held it tight and made him look at him.

"You are not a monster.."

"That worked when I was little, worked when I came back after Stanford, but this isn't like visions Dean, this isn't weird psychic crap this is…completely demonic. It's not something that can be hidden. I'm a freak and the whole world can see it now."

"Sammy…"

"Just don't Dean. I screwed up. I deserve this." Sam said as he starred at his reflection and wondered how long it would be before his reflection was no longer something recognizable.


End file.
